


Pushing Daisies and Other Tales

by I_have_a_Mycroft_of_my_very_own



Series: Forever [3]
Category: Pushing Daisies, The Fall (2006), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Barduilweek, hahaha ooops, theme 6: crack/silly au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-04
Updated: 2015-07-04
Packaged: 2018-04-07 14:27:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4266660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_have_a_Mycroft_of_my_very_own/pseuds/I_have_a_Mycroft_of_my_very_own
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“The pie-maker looks like you, ada! And some of the other characters, too!”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pushing Daisies and Other Tales

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Barduilweek, theme 6: Crack/Silly AU. 
> 
> This is basically an Au where Lee Pace's characters (aside from Thranduil) are all characters in a Children's book found in Dale. I don't know why.

“Ada?” Tilda questions, running to her father and climbing up into his lap. Thranduil raises an eyebrow and glances down at her, before returning his eyes to the letter from his sister.

“Yes, tithen pen?”

“Are you a pie-maker, ada?” Tilda asks, hopeful eyes staring up at Thranduil, who laughs and shakes his head.

“No, dear, I’m a king who occasionally bakes pies, why do you ask?” Thranduil queries, amused, it has been a long time since he’s been around young children, and Tilda reminds him a lot of Tauriel.

“Do you have Back-To-Life abilities?”

“Back-To- no. I don’t. What are they?” Thranduil asks, smiling indulgently.

“Back-To-Life abilities! Can you touch things and bring them back from the dead?”

“Like a necromancer?” Thranduil clarifies with a little frown. “No, penneth, I don’t.”

“Oh, I thought you would.” Tilda says, deflating against Thranduil’s chest with a sigh. “Oh, well!”

“What’s brought this on, Tilda?” Thranduil asks, concerned now.

“I found this really old book in the old cellars.” Tilda replies, proudly holding up an old book. Along the front, written in the language of the Men of Dale reads ‘Pushing Daisies, and Other Tales’.  “The pie-maker looks like you, ada! And some of the other characters, too!” Tilda exclaims flipping the book open to show Thranduil, well, himself. If he were a short, brunet haired human male.

“Oh.”

“See? You look like Ned, ada!” Tilda announces happily, shoving the book into his hands and leaping from his lap onto the floor. “He solves murders! And he bakes pies! And he really, _really_ loves this girl, but he can’t touch her, because he brought her back to life, and if he ever touches her again, she’ll _die, **forever!** ” _Tilda babbles at him excitedly, “And he has this really, really awesome dog called Digby! Who he’s had since he was nine, because Digby died and Ned brought him back! And Digby is going to be with him forever!! And can we get a dog, Ada?”

“You’ll have to speak to your da about that, dear.” Thranduil says absently, flicking through the book. “Where did you say you found this?” Thranduil asks, looking at the girl. “The old cellars?”

“Aha! They’re fixing them up in a few weeks, so they’re clearing out all the rubble!” Tilda chirps, plucking a grape from the bowl on Thranduil’s desk and popping it in her mouth. “Oh, I also found this, too!” Tilda yells, pulling a red eye mask from her pocket and handing it to Thranduil. “It was attached to this.” Tilda hands Thranduil a little card, with the words ‘The Black Bandit’ on one side, and someone who looks a lot like him, wearing the mask on the other. “Put it on, ada! Put it on!” Tilda says, bouncing on the balls of her feet. Thranduil sighs at he puts the card and the book down on the table, along with his crown, in order to put the mask on. To his amazement, it fits snug to his face, like it was made especially for him. Tilda laughs and claps her hands, bouncing up and down. “You’re the Black Bandit, ada!!”

“No, Tilda, I’m not. I need to go see if there is anything else in the cellars.” Thranduil says, pulling the mask from his face, and scooping up his crown.

“Naw, you can’t.” Tilda says, stepping forward to pick up her treasures. “Da’s in a grumpy mood because one of the older buildings collapsed on some of the men when they were working. So Da’s declared all the ruins off limits. That’s why I came to see you when they kicked me out!”  Thranduil pauses, on his way to the door.

“Your da will understand.”

“Nope. I don’t think so.” Tilda replies, bouncing over to Thranduil’s side. Tilda coughs and clears her throat. “’Thran, why did you take our daughter into the ruins when I strictly forbade anyone from going in there?! What were you thinking? You both could have died!!’” she growls, doing a very good impression of her father.

“Who says I’m taking you with me?” Thranduil replies, an eyebrow raised.

“They’re my treasures! I found them first! Besides, you wouldn’t know which cellars to check, and I’m not telling you.” Tilda replies, crossing her arms over her chest defiantly.

“Fine.” Thranduil replies with a sigh, returning to the table. “Bring the book here, Tilda. We can read through it together.”

“Yes!” Tilda exclaims, rushing back over to Thranduil and climbing into his lap again. “I didn’t read past Pushing Daisies before I got kicked out.” Tilda says, opening the book up to the index and resting it in her lap. “What story do you want to read first, ada?”

“How about we read it in order then?” Thranduil asks, looking at the list, “And it looks like The Fall is next.” Tilda nods her head, and flicks through the pages.

“The Fall!” she exclaims, Thranduil smiles, and rests his head on Tilda’s shoulder in order to read the words aloud to her.

Bard finds them hours later, tucked up in the chair, fast asleep. He smiles at them and finds a blanket to drape over them.

“Sweet dreams.” He whispers, kissing them both on the forehead and heading up to bed.  


End file.
